Ashley Cobb Discusses Her New Book And Leaps Of Faith

Ashley Cobb is an award-winning intercourse professional, HIV activist, author, speaker, and social media influencer. She is thought for her no-holds-barred strategy to sexual freedom, particularly for Black ladies, via her on-line platform, Sex With Ashley. The sexpert has a brand new title so as to add to her repertoire — creator. Her new guide, Pleasure, Please!: The Black Woman’s Guide to Unapologetic Pleasure and Confidence hit bookshelves on Feb. 17.

Cobb lately sat down with BLACK ENTERPRISE to discuss the book and her ever-evolving model, Sex With Ashley.

The intercourse educator first gained consideration in 2015 along with her Sex With Ashley weblog, a platform she created not as a result of she had all of the solutions, however as a result of she was trying to find them. Before changing into a intercourse educator, she as soon as served as a “purity-culture chief,” encouraging ladies to abstain from intercourse till marriage. At the time, she embraced messaging that framed sexuality via inflexible non secular ideology as an alternative of her personal autonomy.

“I sort of felt like I used to be doing that as a result of that’s what I used to be advised to do, however it actually wasn’t what I wished to do,” Cobb advised BE.

Stepping away from these teachings allowed Cobb to discover her sexuality extra actually. Cobb, who grew up in the small city of Raeford, North Carolina, says that speaking brazenly about intercourse was thought-about a sin in her family, making her path to changing into a intercourse educator particularly taboo. Cobb mentioned that she knew that different Black ladies, particularly those that shared her  Black Southern church roots, in all probability had related trepidations round their very own sexuality. She was right. Her weblog resonated with 1000’s of readers who had been additionally unlearning disgrace and searching for extra affirming conversations about intercourse.

While working as a center faculty trainer in the course of the day, Cobb blogged about all issues intercourse in her free time. The Sex With Ashley weblog noticed important progress early on, not solely gaining Cobb on-line fame but additionally incomes her the nickname “the intercourse girl” when folks acknowledged her in public.

But the recognition got here with penalties. One of her college students’ mother and father reported the net platform to the varsity administration. Cobb explains that though Sex With Ashley was informational, focused at adults, and contained no specific photographs, her employer nonetheless discovered it inappropriate.

School officers gave Cobb an ultimatum: both delete the blog and maintain her job, or maintain the weblog and resign.

“I selected the latter,” Cobb mentioned.

The author states that she knew Black ladies wanted an area that centered them and the complexities of the Black expertise. She determined to discover a new job and proceed writing. Her new employer additionally finally let her go after studying concerning the weblog. She skilled the identical destiny at her subsequent job.  

After three consecutive dismissals, Cobb knew she was at a crossroads: she needed to both cease running a blog or go “full throttle” with the Sex With Ashley model. 

As a part of her leap of religion, the sexpert started instructing sex-focused lessons and became a Bedroom Kandi sex toy consultant. She says she didn’t got down to develop into a social media influencer, however when she began sharing academic movies on Instagram, she naturally took on that position.

Cobb shifted her focus from running a blog to content material creation. In 2021, she launched a podcast. The Sex With Ashley Podcast is a weekly present providing “unfiltered conversations about Black sexuality.”

The content material creator returned to high school to earn a level in Public Health, which led to a shift in her platform. She started incorporating sexual well being matters into her sex-positive house and began discussing subjects like STIs, HIV, and fertility. Additionally, she started writing articles and columns for Black ladies’s way of life publications.

Pleasure, Please! 

In 2023, her profitable on-line model gained the attention of a guide editor who reached out to Cobb with a guide proposal. The two started creating concepts that led to the creation of Pleasure, Please!: The Black Woman’s Guide to Unapologetic Pleasure and Confidence. Cobb says that the guide presents sensible recommendation for Black ladies of all ages who need to unlearn unhealthy concepts about intercourse which might be typically rooted in patriarchy, faith, and social conditioning. 

“This guide is for any Black lady who desires to discover ways to have higher intercourse, desires to really feel extra assured in her physique, and desires to have the ability to discover ways to make pleasure a precedence of their life,” the creator tells BE.

Additionally, Cobb shares her private journey to sexual liberation. In the guide, she recounts a number of eye-opening experiences, together with internet hosting a nude yoga class. She recollects watching ladies arrive shy and hesitant, solely to develop into extra assured of their our bodies as they noticed different ladies doing the identical. 

Released on Feb. 17: Pleasure, Please!: The Black Woman’s Guide to Unapologetic Pleasure and Confidence is obtainable for purchase online and at most main guide retailers.

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